Well, new years is upon us. I'm a little late to the party, but that's just my style. It's 2016! What are us lesbians to do, what are we to wish for, what are we to resolve to do??
I, along with everyone else, have chosen the typical New Years Resolutions, but I also have a few that might help me to Queer in the New Year.
1. Find queer friends, not just crushes.
I am very guilty of immediately categorizing everyone I meet into "date-able" and "not date-able". And if I meet someone that's date-able, they become my crush. This has happened more times than I can count here in college, and it means I miss out on a lot of really amazing friendship opportunities. I want to find the line between a girl being amazing and pretty and cool, but she doesn't have to be mine. I love having queer friends and they're all around, I just have to change my frame of reference.
2. Slow the swiping.
I'm not saying that I'm going to stop using dating apps entirely. But right now, I have accounts on three different dating apps, and I spend much of my day swiping through them. Eventually, all the amazing girls out there become one amalgam of lesbian that I have to judge and decide on instantly. I like the ability that queer women have to find each other, don't get me wrong. But this lesbian wants to slow it down.
3. Never stop perfecting pronouns.
I have many trans, genderqueer and gender non-conforming friends, so I like to consider myself someone who understands the importance of pronouns. However, I still make mistakes, especially when someone informs me that their pronouns have changed. I know my friends will appreciate it if I keep on perfecting my pronoun usage, and try to never gender someone that hasn't told me their pronouns!
4. Tell her.
Oy. This one isn't about anyone in particular, but it's something I want to continue to do. I'm not a big fan of "we're-flirting-but-not-dating-what-is-this", because I have no time for that. If I like you, I'll tell you. Do I have to work on timing and whether or not it's the best decision? Yes. But I like how forward I am, and I want to keep it up this year.